fightface.

We are not your Israel. Canada is not the promised land. In the 1600s, American slaves fled to our provinces in hopes of freedom. Instead of education and opportunities, they found lives of indentured servitude and people who were more than willing to sell them back to their slave owning neighbours. In the early 2000s, once marriage equality and non-discrimination laws were passed, our LGBT friends from the south once again saw us as their escaped.

For centuries Canada has been the promised land for the oppressed. Toronto is the most multicultural city in the world. The whole world. We are a diverse community that for generations has prided itself on it’s left wing politics and laisse-faire attitude. So what changed? Was it the second time PM elect, and notoriously conservative Harper? Is it the forceful presence from our American neighbours (and subsequently their conservative behaviours?), or is this just a situation of wanting to try a new direction?

Honestly, I’m not sure if I can answer that, and I’m not sure who can. Earlier today, I was reading an article on www.thestar.ca about the recent gay-bashings in the Village. This city is one of the safest places I can imagine myself, and while I don’t frequent the Village apart from volunteer duties, and the occasional night out, that’s the one place that should be free from discrimination and violence.

I’m sick of people saying that “it takes time”, and “it’s not that bad”. Well, guess what? This is it. I’m not a victim, or a survivor, or anything else that would make me submissive to the majority. So go ahead; hit me. slushie me. kick me when I’m down.

And guess what? We’re not your promised land. We fight for the benefits that you reap, so either put on your fight face, or stay out.

life overbooked.

Lately, I feel like between classes, I sleep all day, wake up, go out, and repeat. The past few months have been so hectic that taking time for anything than catching up on sleep has been a luxury.

Last week alone, I balanced school, work and fashion week. I decided that working the event would be the best way to meet new people and catch a few shows (and I caught all the shows!) If fashion is something that you’re into, I highly suggest volunteering at a Fashion Week in your area (if of course, you’re lucky enough to be located near a major host city).

Before fashion week, there was a slew of social activities including Nuit Blanche, my favourite overnight art show (or the only over night art show?), and a bunch of birthday celebrations, all of which reminded me just how amazing my friends are, and how lucky I am to have them in my life.

My recent gratitude has prompted me to get more involved in the community. As much as I enjoyed fashion week, that particular type of volunteer work is almost considered an internship, it isn’t so much “selfless assistance” to those in need. I applied to give my time to the 519, the Toronto LGBTQ community centre, and I can’t wait to hear back from them.

As busy as life has been, that’s all that I have for right now.

xo, peace and love.

guess who’s back?!

It’s been a long, long, long time bloggies, but I’m back. I’ve missed the interwebs, and I’ve missed my blog. Since my last post, I’ve finished up my summer class, went to New York, went to Vermont, and then to Montreal. After that, I quickly re situated myself back where I belong – Toronto. School starts in about 10 days, and my friends are slowly trickling back into my life. Through my travels, I’ve made some new amigos, and done some really hard core soul searching, I even went to church! But now that that’s all over, I’m back to school, work and friends right here. Now, to plan my next adventure, should it be San Francisco? or Vancouver for the summer (I will have a job there = a HUGE plus). Who know’s where I will go, I have plenty of time to decide.

I want to post a more in depth recap of my trip (with pictures, woot!), but I need to go work it like the rent’s due tomorrow, so ciao for now

xoxo.

even satan would’ve turned on the a/c by now.

… Words from a slightly ‘special’ woman who was on the subway with me this morning. And her condition aside, the city is so hot right now, it’s almost unbearable. I’m stewing, and have a paper to write. I need a mojito.

Thanks to wordpress’ introducing me to Plinky.com, I’ve decided to use their idea prompter. I want to back track to a few days ago when the topic was “Where Do You See Yourself in 10 Years?

In 10 years, I see myself living in either Montreal or Toronto with a stable yet challenging and ever evolving career and a lady who loves me.

My ultimate dream is to be an editor of a fashion/culture magazine. I say culture because as much as I am intregued by the glossy pages of Vogue and Vanity Fair, I equally enjoy AdBusters. I feel like both would be great creative outlets for me. Since I’m only 19, I don’t expect to be filling Anna Wintour’s shoes before I turn 30, but I sure want to be on my way!

I also hope to be fluent in French by then. Technically, my university requires me to be bilingual in order to graduate, but our French program is notorious for sneaking students by, just in order to graduate. The requirements and expectations are far too much for AYNONE to accomplish in 4 years, so I’m giving myself the extra time to perfect the things not found in a text book.

And lastly, I want to be with someone who is as driven as I am, but who knows when to follow her heart. My career will almost always go above my personal relationships, except for when my heartstrings are being yanked so hard that I can’t help but take notice. I can’t explain, but I just KNOW when listen to my heart, and trust me it isn’t often! I hope I find someone who understands that.

when i grow up.

When I grow up, I want to be an editor. Right now, I am the editor in chief of my blog, and to some extent, my life. Recently, a friend sent me one of those chain email surveys that went out of style back in 1999. I decided to do it, just for old times sake, and because I truthfully have nothing better to do.

Do you like blue cheese?
No. It’s probably the only cheese that I. CANNOT. STAND.

Do you own a weapon?
Nothing sharper than a steak knife

What flavor Kool-Aid is your favorite?
strawberry-kiwi

Do you get nervous before a doctor appointment?
Not really. I’m a healthy girl

What do you think of hotdogs?
I like turkey dogs

Favorite Christmas movie?
Does RENT count as a Christmas movie? Does it really even count as a movie at all? If so, then RENT

Can you do push ups?
Not at all haha

What’s your favorite piece of jewelry?
A white gold pendant and chain my mum gave me for my 16th birthday

Favorite hobby?
Reading NYLON and drinking tea

Favorite quote of the day?
“We have no evidence that tree and elephants communicate with one another” My prof this morning, and yes, she was being 100% serious!

What’s your weight?
Honey, I’m an open book; unfortunately for you, the fact isn’t in it

Middle name?
Yes I have one. Two actually.

Name 3 thoughts at this exact moment?
I really need to go grocery shopping. Damn it’s cold for June. Yay, my metro pass will work tomorrow

Current worry?
Not having groceries. And I’m hunnngry.

Current hate right now?
My laziness regarding my will to go to the grocery store

Favorite place to be?
New York, or Kensington market.

Where would you like to go?
To Pride (but I’ll be working. boo), New York (t-30 days!), the shower.

Do you own slippers?
I own Old Navy flippy floppies.

What color shirt are you wearing right now?
A teal AA v-neck with a black cardi over it

Can you whistle?
Yes.

Favorite color?
Black, Dark denim (yes, for this it IS a colour!)

Would you be a pirate?
Only if I get Keira Knightley

What songs do you sing in the shower?
Some Amy Whinehouse, maybe some MEghan Tonjes.

What’s in your pocket?
I don’t have pockets.

Last thing that made you laugh?

I was watching 1 Girl 5 Gays on MTV, I can’t get through an episode without laughing!

Worst injury you’ve ever had as a child?
I stuck my middle finger in the wheel of a stationary bike. Every time I showed someone the scar, it looked like I was flipping them off.

Do you love where you live?
More than anything.

How many TVs do you have?
Nada.

Who is your loudest friend?
Probably me…

How many dogs do you have?
None.

Cats?
Zero.

Does someone have a crush on you?
Not that I know of. If there is, they BEST fill me in ASAP. Mamma needs some action!

What is your favorite book?
Peter Pan, or The Book of Negroes

What is your favorite candy?
Halva. It’s not really candy, but it’s sweet and chocolately!

What song do you want played at your funeral?

Crosses by Jose Gonzalez

you can cry when you get older.

This weekend, I lived a pice of history. On June 26th 2010, the G20 Summit began in Downtown Toronto. For weeks now, there have been news reports on the event, and since I work in the Downtown Core, there were plenty of security memos for us to review. Growing up in Canada, and even living in our biggest city, most people will say that they have no fear of violence or Police brutality; this weekend, that all changed.

The weeks leading up to the G20 were filled with preparations, including the previously mentioned news articles and memos repeatedly reminding citizens to carry identification on them at all times, and to review the restricted city zones. We watched in awe and disgust as a chain link fence was built around the Convention Centre, and shuddered when boarding a street car filled with cops in riot gear. While out of towners read the reports of the goings on and feared, most of us Torontonians went about our lives as usual, shaking out heads and wondering if the $1 Billion price tag for security was really necessary.

It was.

Just like every other Saturday, I went to work, and despite the previous day’s evacuation, I didn’t really think that anything would go down. Then, at approximately 4pm, the entire Downtown Core was issued into a state of emergency, and the police shut down the city. Subways, busses and street cars stopped running, and all hell broke loose. 6 Police cars were smahed and burned, tear gas was released and rubber bullets shot. Banks were broken into and businesses along Spadina, Queen West, University, College, Bay, King and Yonge Street were luded. Out beautiful city was being destroyed before our tear filled eyes. To make matters worse, 30 police uniforms that were stolen earlier this week (and despite Chief claims that they were retuned) were worn by rioters who proceeded to masquerade as officers.

As of right now, the arrest count is at 560 people.

Because I was on lockdown inside the Centre, I was assumed safe, and I was. There were tearful phone calls to family and friends, all of whom had been phoning and phoning, but phone lines were more tied up than a dominatrix’s charge.

At 6pm, my co workers and I were finally allowed to leave, and by this point, some subways were running. Never before have I been so happy to be home.

Tomorrow, my intentions are to visit the rubble. As sadistic as it is, I can’t turn off the news, and I want to get some photographs of the destruction. I never want to see something like this again.

This weekend, my home has been destroyed by people who don’t have a care in the world. This weekend, I experienced real fear.

No One Mourns the Wicked.

It’s been a LONG time since I’ve blogged. I decided to take a bit of a break and focus on school, my friends work, and planning my trips. It’s not as though blogging takes a lot of time out of my life, it’s just that I felt as though I was blogging without cause. I was ranting and complaining more than writing. So after this little update blog, I’ll be back to doing what I started out to do; document the life of a young queer girl in Toronto.

Since I last updated, I went to Montreal for a weekend with my parents, and yes, I survived. Funnier still, I went to attend a wedding. Weddings are hard for queers, even ones as lucky as me, who live in a place where I can get hitched. Being a closeted lesbian and going to a family wedding is basically a slap in the face, a portrait of something that I’ll never have. Luckily there was an open bar.

I’m also taking a summer class, Children’s Literature. This class the THE most popular class at my campus, for everyone from English to Economics majors, so you can imagine how hard it is to get into. I think this easier (but by no means lighter; it’s two novels a week AT LEAST) reading load has reaffirmed my love for literature. Reading is like exercising; no matter how tired and lazy I’m feeling, opening a book makes me feel so much better.

Anywho, that’s it for now. I’m listening to the Wicked soundtrack right now, and just wanted to say; it’s fan-fucking-tastic.

Oh, and one more thing; right after my last post, I got my hands on a copy of Spring Awakening, and I read it cover to cover in an afternoon. I’m not a huge drama reader, but I LOVED this play… maybe because it’s easy to fantasize about Lea Michele as I read ;-} joking.

xo.